EXCERPTS PART IV -- the final one

2004.01.10 it's an amazing thing when you meet that person and this most surreal relationship for some unknown and mysterious reason goes to hell in an fedex envelope, and not like relationships in the past have inevitably done, but in a way that makes you wage jihad on opportunity for its policy of knocking only once.

2004.01.15 'judge a person's looks by how attractive they are right before they sneeze.' / david rowyn

2004.01.19 is it possible to lie about being a liar?  in other words, if i told you i was a liar, but i truthfully was not a liar, then have i just become one?  just a random thought.

2004.01.23 when i was five, i believed i was superman and ran full speed into the wall of a house believing i would fly through it.  it broke my collarbone.

2004.01.30 'contrast' / lovers earth and moon / bliss in an unorthodox / never ending stare

2004.02.05 hopefully, i will be able to visit alaska and hawaii soon.  the northwest would be fun too...i mean, i like rain, potatoes, and mormons just as much as the next guy.

2004.02.08 in virtually all relationships one of the couple feels stronger toward the other than the other feels toward them.  the gap in emotional symmetry may be slight or gargantuan in size, but it's almost always there.  sometimes, you know if you're the one with the stronger feelings or if they are the one with the stronger feelings.  i've been both.  i've learned, however, that if you don't know which of the above you are or you think you're in a perfectly symmetrical relationship, you're probably the one whose feelings aren't completely reciprocated by the other person.  more than likely.

2004.02.15 at this point in my life, valentines day means very little to me.  for people with someone, it often seems to be an extra gift giving day that can partially erase some of your recent bickering and fighting or that one little indiscretion of the recent past, and/or make you pretend that your relationship hasn't gone stagnant yet.  i know, i'm so uplifting.

2004.02.21 has anyone ever seen a film in a movie theater that had a balcony, because i'm putting that on my list of things to do -- right under crafting a perfect counterfeit peso...with the growth of the internet, it seems that we could all log on once a week, verify our identity and vote on proposed bills and amendments, and everyfinn like that, thereby eliminating the need for congressmen -- or is it congress people?  a government of the people, by the people -- what an idea!

2004.02.29 in other news, i've done a thorough search of my apartment and i can conclusively state that no WMD have been found; however, we did uncover a suspiciously large amount of mechanical pencils.

2004.03.03 shifting gears, if you find someone of the opposite sex really annoying and you think they find you very annoying also, then that probably means you're going to end up making babies with them.

2004.03.06 you know, in some parts of this world, you actually give a gift to someone else on your birthday.  with that in mind, my address is david rowyn, 701 W....

2004.03.12 you know, the only thing anyone ever really wants is someone who understands everything about them, and loves them anyway.  but everyone wants the honey and not the sting.  without the sting, there isn't complete understanding, and sometimes the sting becomes the honey.

2004.03.19 xanga part one

2004.03.29 xanga part two

2004.04.03 'they who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night.' / edgar allan poe

2004.04.06 i am a hypochondriac

2004.04.11 why do post office employees work in the pouring rain, but the homeless on the street corner stop panhandling in the lightest rain?  when was the last time you actually saw a chicken cross the road?  why do i have to write three one liners to increase the overall humor?

2004.04.27 under the fold, i'm toying with the theory that people who say something like, 'because i'm a nice guy' probably aren't.  i won't mention anyone's name...because i'm a nice guy.

2004.04.29 random question -- are you a bouncer or a gazer?  i'm a gazer -- though i probably bounce on occasion.  what i mean is i find some people when looking at someone else gaze at a single eye while others bounce back and forth from one eye to the other...oh yeah, i cut my long hair off.  but it should grow back unless i confuse the nair bottle with the shampoo.

2004.05.21 i regularly visit only four websites -- google, xanga, weather.com, and ebay.  something tells me i'm not making the most of this whole internet thing.

2004.05.29 the 'award' show for country music 'artists' came on the tube today, and i made a startling discovery.  country singers shop at urban outfitters.  read that again.  it's more amusing the second time.

2004.06.03 in addition, we all know that hearing a song can bring back a memory faster than [insert something fast here], but i'm fascinated with how certain melodies and chord progressions can seemingly trigger certain emotions.  furthermore, it would seem that most songs can be placed in one of two categories -- night songs, or day songs.  has anyone else had this same revelation?

2004.06.09 the afterlaugh is an interesting psychosomatic response.  first, you laugh at something intensely and sustain the laughter for quite some time before the funny fades and you quiet down.  then, after a few seconds or minutes, a summarized version of what made you laugh in the first place replays in your head, and you burst into laughter again. ah, the afterlaugh.

2004.07.06 why is it that no matter how huge an event was in the history of mankind or a country -- from the crusades to world war ii to 9/11 -- it can always be crammed into a one hour primetime television special?.

// david rowyn

listen :: smashing pumpkins - tonight tonight

/ time is never time at all
/ you can never ever leave without leaving a piece of youth

check out: namestatistics.com

judging by the thousands of nonexistent comments, i don't know if you're even reading these 'greatest hits' entries -- if you are let me know.  in any case, i sort of have to finish things i start, so this is:



EXCERPTS PART III (of four)



2003.06.01 wait, come back! i almost forgot to tell you how much i wanted you to leave already.

2003.06.11 i think i might invent a computer keyboard that, after you use it for a while, looks like it's running out of ink on the screen. or not.

2003.06.14 'make reasonable requests and unreasonable demands.' / david rowyn, elected president of the universe.

2003.06.18 i bet the people that go around saying 'ignorance is bliss' are the same people that go around saying 'knowing is half the battle'.

2003.06.19 people probably don't save my words, so they may never get it down the road, but that doesn't mean it wasn't there for them to have.

2003.06.26 now i question you - have you ever wanted something you didn't need, needed something you didn't want, wanted someone you didn't need, needed someone you didn't want?

2003.07.10 perhaps there's always a need there somewhere and if you are able to unearth it and believe you can fill it, you only need to convince the other person that you're the only one who can fill it and they'll never leave you.

2003.07.14 why do people stand on opposite sides of the car, open their respective doors, and then proceed to talk over the roof of the car for a while instead of getting in the car and talking?

2003.07.15 'even inspiration gets two weeks of vacation.' / david rowyn

2003.07.21 i think we should be encouraged to pursue our own unique visions without being told we need to 'wake up' or 'come back to the real world'. i think everyone should live in their 'own little world', and if they want to they can let someone else visit, or they can combine their little world with someone else's.

2003.07.30 though slightly damaged, and maybe not the best looking of the bunch, it was still exactly what i wanted to find from the very beginning

2003.08.29 the answer to most questions...is maybe, maybe not...

2003.09.17 there are countless examples of men killing someone over the love of a woman; however, when a girl wants to kill over the love of a guy, she often gets another man to do it for her.

2003.10.03 if you know me...you know that i live in the grey area on most things. but, in this, i've reached the decision, for the moment, not to lie. that's that.  well, i suppose i should mention that i do take advantage of people's poor listening skills in various ways...often.

2003.10.11 'you can't be angry with a dying rose when you never cared to give it water.' / david rowyn

2003.11.15 you know that deep down you're falling out of love with someone, yet you try endlessly to reassure yourself that you aren't and that you still love them. for days and weeks you continue to try to build something certain on this foundation of sand; but truly the only thing that is certain is the coming of the tide.

2003.12.09 i loathe reading on someone's blog what they consider their poetic masterpiece, but which is, in reality, a testament to the warning of thesaurus overuse. and what's with angsty teenage poetry and the word 'bleeding'?

2003.12.16 let's learn something new that we can use in conversation to get rid of those awkward silences when you're talking to someone without your clothes on.

2003.12.31 so for the next 18 hours, it's just me and the five wires and tape recorder that are fastened to my chest.  silly effing heart palpitations.  with the heightened security everywhere, this bulky wired contraption just might get me shot or strip searched should i choose to show up among some throng of people tonight; and i'm considering doing just that.  but i probably won't be lucky enough to get the strip search.

// david rowyn

listen :: prince - the grand progression (unreleased)

/ if love were gold then i would be fixed for life

introducing the reverse quiz! patent pending.  there are three correct answers and only one incorrect answer.  the correct answers are weighted to make it interesting.  it's multiple choice so it should be fun and easy.

1. my favorite colors are:

a) light blue, brown, white
b) khaki, dark blue, orange
c) fire engine red, olive green, yellow
d) purple, black, silver

2. when asked what my favorite movies of all time are, i most often reply:

a) underworld and the crow
b) donnie darko and batman
c) the neverending story and labyrinth
d) the comfort of strangers and the sixth sense

3. which of the following happened when i was youngest?

a) i broke my collarbone by running toward a wall at full speed
b) i moved to connecticut
c) i started playing chess
d) i skipped a grade

4. my favoirte solo musician and band are:

a) prince and dave matthews band
b) john mayer and the used
c) alanis morissette and black eyed peas
d) prince and our lady peace

5. my least favorite fast food restaurant is:

a) taco bell
b) burger king
c) wendys
d) mcdonalds

6. my longsest 'official' relationship lasted:

a) six weeks
b) three months
c) six months
d) two years

7. my favorite city is:

a) miami
b) nashville
c) austin
d) new york city

8. the eye and hair colors i like most in the opposite sex:

a) green/hazel eyes brown hair
b) blue eyes blonde hair
c) light brown eyes brown hair
d) green eyes red hair

9. when learning something, i prefer:

a) videos
b) classrooms
c) audio tapes
d) books

10. i usually feel more comfortable communicating with someone:

a) online
b) in person alone
c) on the phone
d) in person with a group

bonus:  the last four digits of my phone number are:

a) 7074
b) 0061
c) 6673
d) 3409

// david rowyn

listen :: the get up kids - i'll catch you

/ no need for reminding

it's been a while since i've had a long entry, so i thought maybe now would be a good time. ok, you've already started reading; you might as well finish the post.

it's a wonderful thing when you meet that person you seem to connect with on a level that you couldn't ever describe properly with words, and you find yourself being catapulted towards them even though you try to back away - the person who shows you the view from the top of the love-hate fence.  the one who it makes no sense to love.  the one you can communicate to in subtle expressions.  ok, i think i'm done making pseudo-stereotypical one liners when you all probably understand the meaning already.

yeah, it's an amazing thing when you meet that person and this most surreal relationship for some unknown and mysterious reason goes to hell in an fedex envelope, and not like relationships in the past have inevitably done, but in a way that makes you wage jihad on opportunity for its policy of knocking only once.

now, you might think you smell sarcasm in my words, and i usually do bring them to a broil in a solution laced with plenty, but this time my 'the glass really is half empty you idiots' persona has actually found a wonderful side effect to the aforementioned scenario.

the side effect is this - you stop caring about what other people think.  you used to carefully form your responses to card carrying members of the opposite sex, but now you simply speak your mind directly and bluntly.  if they get turned off, bitter, or offended, you don't mind.  it's not like you are going out of your way to make them feel a certain way, you simply say exactly what you are thinking, and leave your buddy 'tact' at home watching re-runs of mtv's newlyweds with jessica and nick lachey.  in the past, you'd adopt a slightly higher pitched voice and tell others what they wanted to hear when they asked for your opinion probably because you didn't want to lose them as a friend, and now you simply state what's on your mind.

some before and afters ought to clear it up:

before:
she: i just bought these new boots.  aren't they cute?
you: yeah, they are.  you have an interesting fashion sense.

after:
she: i just bought these new boots.  aren't they cute?
you: honestly, the first thought that came to my mind when i saw those furry things was that you must have stepped on a couple of kittens on your way over, but if you like them, fantastic.

and for the ladies...

before:
him: listen to this new song i just wrote.  (plays song on guitar)
you: wow that's great!  you really have a lot of talent.

after:
him: listen to this new song i just wrote.  (plays song on guitar)
you: that couldn't even qualify as experimental jazz.  you're all over the place and the melody sounds like it's on life support in a mexican hospital.  you can do better.

ok, those are a bit on the extreme side, but they serve to illustrate the idea...almost.  there is certainly a place for more artful linguistics, but i believe it's better to say what you think (or at the least convey your true feelings somehow) and let the other person feel how they choose to feel.  because the reality is, they choose to feel the way they do - you really can't make anyone feel one way.

but let's get back to the benefits of this approach.  i've noticed that in the beginning, you'll get labeled as an asshole or something, but by those who want to only hear what they want to hear.  others might first be set back by your blatant honesty, but they soon start appreciating it.  members of the opposite sex find it refreshing apparanlty and oddly enough gravitate toward you and others respect your being forthcoming, and go out of their way to seek out your opinion.  it's a nice feeling when someone tells you they want your opinion on something because they know you'll tell it like it is.  no more, no less.

we'll call it the simon effect.  if you really wanted to be a sucessful pop star, whose opinion would you value the most and trust to steer you in the best direction - paula abdul or simon?  exactly.  because you know which one will give you their honest opinion.

yes it is only one person's opinion and that's important to remember, but uncovering an individuals honest opinion these days is so damn difficult.  we live in a world of 'yes' men and women.  be the one who stands out.  who knows, maybe you'll find back doors to your once stillborn relationship that even opportuinty itself couldn't unearth.

// david rowyn

listen :: oasis - wonderwall

/ there are many things that i would like to say to you
/ but i don't know how